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There's no nice way to put this. You were a rebound fuck, Dirk. If you hadn't walked by, it would have been someone else.
I really could use the money, and Chris said he really wanted to go on the trip since it had been a few years since he'd seen his two sisters. He suggested adjusting the time he'd be gone so he could return in time to celebrate the special day with me.
As much as it hurt to know I couldn't go with him, I was okay with the compromise.
So I searched for support online and came across a popular fetish website. Found that there were varying aspects of all the roles, not just the hardcore stuff I'd been told about.
It helped that I could be anonymous and still get advice.